The Maiden Voyage

I am a covert farmer.  This is an odd statement for all sorts of reasons, not the least of which is that at the moment, I am farming nothing.  Added to that is the obvious fact that one cannot operate covertly and at the same time publish his doings for all the world to see.

So then why the pretentious assertion?  I will soon be trying my hand at making a living as a farmer, but I don't want anyone to know it...yet.  Right now, I am a gainfully employed father of five, living a pretty darn good life. I go to work at a place where I am valued and I come home to a loving wife and children.  A paycheck is automatically deposited into my bank account twice a month. There is a surplus left over after paying all of our expenses to do things like eat out or go to the movies (or buy a gun ;).  I work for a school, so I have almost every weekend off and most of the summer months.  My health insurance is payed for and I am eligible for "free" money to continue my education.  If I opt to go the route of some of my colleagues, I could potentially have the letters P-H and D chiseled after my name on a gravestone one day.

Small-scale farmers, on the other hand, don't get the weekends off. The cow doesn't care if your grandpa died or Jesus was born, it still has to be milked.  One's income is dictated by the unfettered market (in theory anyways), and a bumper crop doesn't necessarily mean that there will be a fat wad of cash sitting in the bank.  In fact, take a check from the wrong person and you might be out inventory, labor and cash.  Health insurance is having extra bottles of Advil in the house.  And as for going to town to catch a movie, according to the Godfather of sustainable farmers, Joel Salatin, you're better off watching the mating rituals of your poultry.

And my crazy ass wants to trade the first choice for the second!  Yeah, I'd better keep this one to myself, at least for a while, unless I want my mother-in-law to come cash in my life insurance plan early for her daughter.  This blog, dear reader, may well be the virtual equivalent of watching a car crash happen in slow motion before your very eyes.  Or it might be a record of God's providence as He continues to take care of idiots, drunkards, children and the United States.  Time will tell.